Publication day for Able Seacat Simon – cats everywhere flock to find a copy to sit on
They say there is nothing like a dame, but, in cat land, there is nothing like a nice warm book to sit on, particularly when the book in question is a high quality hardback edition with a picture of another cat on the jacket. Which is why the publication of Lynne Barrett-Lee’s new novel, Able Seacat Simon, has proved to be such a landmark day for felines.
‘It’s changed my life,’ commented Kia, a bengal-cross and part-time model from Oxford. ‘Previously, I was expected to make do with day-old copies of the Nursing Times or, if I was lucky, the odd left-out kitchen table place mat. To have my own, thoughtfully-themed, sitting place has been a complete joy.’
Mr Thompkinson, a Maine Coon who lives with his partner Magic Paws in sunny Pevensey Bay, East Sussex, agrees, adding that ‘having a naval hero on which to park my ample backside has added a real filip to my day. Though, being a Maine Coon, I’d have preferred it if they’d purchased a couple.’
Another famous cat, Lola Rose, formerly of Merthyr Tydfil, disagrees. ‘This is typical of the sort of sheep-like behaviour you tend to see when a cat-book goes viral. Everyone wants a piece of it, so they feel in with the in-crowd. Which is something no self-respecting cat should ever want to be. For my money (not that I have any, being a cat) you’re always better off with a discarded cardboard box. Can get on it, get in it, and, if you feel so inclined, chew the corners.I won’t be buying into this, I’m afraid.’
It seems Lola Rose is in a minority of one, however, as felines everywhere mewl, squawk and generally harass their confounded owners to grab a copy, not least, as remarked upon by Stan, an RSCPA rescue tom from North Cardiff, because ‘it’s, like, got this cool embossed patch you can polish your whiskers on, too. Just sick, man. Total blissville.’ And so on.
Happily, you’ll find it in Sainsbury’s, ASDA, and branches of W H Smith everywhere. And of course Amazon. Which is a markedly less dangerous river than the 1949 Yangtse, on which HMS Amethyst – and, of course, brave young Simon – were both stranded. Which is kind of …
Okay. I’ll stop now.